10.13.06
‘Uh… I think we need to pull a Panama! ‘
Thirsty Thursday: Clone Wars Edition.
Perfect Tommy is working the bar, training an energetic asian kid with a lot of piercings and who responds to the unlikely name of Say. Perfect Tommy (so named after a character from the best cheeseball B movie of the 80’s, “Buckaroo Banzai”) and I chat about Red, and just how cool Swedish chicks are in general.
The pub seems light-hearted, despite the drop in temperature, and people seem mellow and relaxed. As I pop out for a smoke and a chat with Craig The Bouncer, I casually take in the 3rd Ave. scene. I see a familiar head bobbing up and down at the Banc, across the avenue. Its Heather, chatting away with Em, the wildly creative red-head. I call her and tell her to wave across the street, but of course she wants me to pop over and say hi.
I finish my ale, leave it on the bar with a napkin on it and tell Perfect Tommy to ‘put my beers on hold, I’ll be right back’ and chat with the ladies for a while about Fed-Ex, movies, insurance, art, famous homeless people, Braking for Jake, and Heather’s Super Mum, who is in town.
3 pints later it hits me: O Shit. I’ve got a tab running across the street, as well as my bag, hopefully still slung over the back of a barstool. I quickly apologize to the ladies (who were getting ready to leave anyway) and book across 3rd. Perfect Tommy chastising me for leaving him with the ladies too long. As I settle back into that scene, I get the nicotine urge once again and pop back outside. Craig is talking to some guy, who he introduces as Alpha, a former bartender, ex-marine and now owner of his own private security firm.
OK, let’s be honest: the guy was a fucking Merc.
Thousand yard stare, rigid back, flat top hair used to measure how level stuff is, handshake that could pulverize rocks, and forearms bigger than my friggin’ thighs. And his energy and mannerisms just speak Action Hero. The guy’s got amazing stories about Africa, the Middle East, The Far East, and I spend a good hour just listening to his lurid tales, but I realize its a school night and have to head on home…
And as I’m walking back to the pad, I realize: I shoulda given him my business card, considering my soon-to-be vocationally challenged status. Hell, every Action Hero needs a geeky sidekick who can work computers, fix anything, and retort with quick witted banter.
And I’m that guy.
